Jesus Overload

Ever been overloaded? Exhausted? Spent? I have...in fact...I am.
Mentally. Physically. Spiritually. Not quite emotionally, but I'm gettin there.
I just need a few hours where my brain is not required to be doing something.
I'm in a constant state of thinking, analyzing, adjusting, and understanding.
Stripped from all that I know, I'm forced to redefine my life. If I don't, I fail.
I'm sent away. Kicked off the island if you will. This being the consequence, I'm
constantly aware of my words, actions, and dress. Now, I'm not saying that it's
a bad thing that I'm having to mold myself and my life into a more Christ-like
image...I'm just saying, it's exhausting. I feel a little like Paul. Paul had to do an
instantaneous 180 with his life when the Lord met him on the road to Damascus.
He was yanked out of his old life, and thrown into a new...completely unfamiliar
new one. Of course, God used him to do unbelievably awesome things for the
Kingdom, so I only have good things to look forward to. But it doesn't reduce the
undeniable fact that right now, at this point in the race, I wish I could just "put my
Jesus down" for a day. That doesn't mean I want to take a day off and go emerse
myself in sin and seperate myself from God...it just means I wish I could give my
brain a rest from the constant flow of God into it. I feel like a sponge that is full-up.
So many things are just forced down my throat on a daily basis and I don't have 3
seconds to digest it all...yet I'm expected to remember and regurgitate all the
information in the form of tests, essays, and just discussion.
I've been a born-again Christian for almost 8 years now and have been to more
church services, youth rallies, and church camps than I can count...so you'd think
this would be a breeze for me. What I didn't realize before I came here was that
even though I thought I was being a 24/7 Christian, I wasn't. Now that I desire and
am somewhat required to be a 24/7 Christian...I'm overloaded. I have to take a step
back and say to God, "Father, I love you. But this is gonna take time. I can't handle
so much of your glory in this short of time. Be patient with me...I'll come around."
It is my prayer that my Savior will understand and work on my heart so that I
will be able to effectively take in and give out the love that I'm experiencing now.
I have 45 other classmates who I'm sure are feeling the same things as me, so if
nothing else...at least I'm not alone.